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Munged.Org Where Wookie waxes loquatious, because he can.

ROFL -- The Humor Arkive

These files have come to me via the internet, and even before then. Some of it is from the BBS days before I was really on the net. Some of it is badly dated, but possibly interesting to read anyway. The really old stuff also has a habit of showing up again in new forms, so consider this a way of documenting What Has Gone Before.

Enjoy:

Minnesota Yet another place where they talk funny.
CEO From the ENRON and WorldComm scandals.
Dogs Thoughts on life with a dog.
Paint How dumb do airlines think we are, really?
Code The code.
Two Dead Boys One bright day in the middle of the night...
Huh? A good question.
Deteriorata Cynical. Probably more useful in the end than Desiderata.
Desiderata Thoughtful.
Techies Techies as significant others. A how-to.
Sexes A comparison of the differences.
Programmers Real Programmers.
Clueless Good advice.
Languages If you wanted to shoot yourself in the foot.
Fundamental Differences in outlook explained.
Burnout Microsoft comments on burning out
Chem A story about little quizies.
Barney The end of big and purple.
Horoscope 2 A "virtual horoscope", whatever that is.
Horoscope 1 A horoscope. Claims to be accurate.
Ditty A comment on who likes to connect to what.
Bang The '!' in short supply.
Diskettes If you ever have to use one again, here's how to keep it in good shape.
Ode I can't do this sober or drunk.
Sex Sex internationally.
Drive What driving to the store would be like if cars were operating systems.
God If the toilet had a name.
Scientists Identifying assorted types of professors.
Haystack How assorted systems find a needle in a haystack.
Dodging How to avoid the draft (in case it comes back)...
Cars Vehicles (and drivers) to stay away from.
Peevetown Always good advice.
Thesis How not to get your PhD.
Crossing How software chickens cross a road.
Titles How to decode IT job titles.
Blowout Quite a good, old-fashioned, hand-crafted, complaint.
Cat Poe's cat on the raven.
Nightgown What to iron, and why.
Lubbock, TX Things learned there
Poker Concepts at play
Games Fun you may not have thought of
Evolution Lifecycle of a programmer
Elephants Increasing technical awareness
Spoilers Be considerate.
Roundtable Disney heroines get together
Creationism A provisional FAQ
Basics File transfer 101
UNIXLand Another Alice... Another Wonderland...
Alice's PDP‑10 That's why I called this song "Alice's PDP-10".
Compatible The remaking of HAL 9000
Roommate How to manage a roommate.
Cucumbers 101 Reasons Women Prefer Cucumbers to Men
Dating The difference between men and women.
Rune‑sore‑bees Room service. For those who travel.
Spelling A poem illustrating the dangers of blindly trusting spell checkers.
Devil A coding story involving jelly donuts.
Beginning "God created the bit. And the bit was a zero."
Service Died A song about the day AOL suffered a 19-hour outage.
Bathroom Tech support for what comes (goes?) naturally there.
Coffee You know you are drinking to much when...
Assignment English assignment gone horribly wrong. Or did it......
Poe Lines found in an office wastebasket, supposedly...
Felix A parable about schedules, cycle times, and shaping new behaviors.
Perverse What not to do with/around computers.
Real What REAL computer people are actually like.
People How many people does it take...
Girlfriends
Addendum
Consumer Reports takes a look at girlfriends.
And an update from a Technical User.
Gogh Relatives of the famous painter.
Spoilage How to tell when to throw that science experiment out.
Men 100 Reasons its good to be a man.
Toaster If they made toasters.
Haiku The Haiku list.
Overlord If I became an Evil Overlord
Waka A poem.
DigitalLand A different kind of wonderland...
Slaves This is not the Christmas song you are looking for.
Shorts Quotes, small jokes, and other simple stuff.
Cows You have two cows...
Beer If operating systems were beer...
Rejection How to handle that rejection letter for the job you wanted so badly...
Chicken Why did the chicken cross the road?
Rules 1
Rules 2
A couple of takes on rules men wished women knew.
Stalls How to choose a urinal in the gents.
Toaster "He showed them both a shiny metal box with two slots in the top, a control knob, and a lever."
Specs If houses were specified like software often is.
Cybersex As in real life, so goes the online world, once in a while.
Seuss A review of one of the good doctor's works.
Earache "Here, eat this root."
Thinking TA - Thinkers Anonymous
OSHA You want to put this up at work. You know you do.
Thoughts Humorous thoughts.
Equipped What are you equipped to do?

Stories

The main thing about these are that they are true, actually happened, or are otherwise verifiable.

Smarties When an ISP runs out of candy.
Leap? To Leap, or Not to Leap?
Sinking Feeling That feeling you get when you've deleted all the files on a system, and how to recover from it.
Groundhog Busted with a illicit groundhog.

Jokes

I post very few actual jokes. Mostly this is because there are so many other internet joke archives. The best is the “Rec.Humor.Funny” archive. However, some amuse me so much that I want to keep them around.

Cockroach Sucks to be this guy.
30 Minutes A suitable reward.
Emotions A New York joke, involving a costume party.
Wish Be careful what you wish for...
Answer What comes first, the chicken, or the egg?
McGreggor Why they call him what they do.
Nuns Show him your cross.
Hell Living in Hell
Lettuce So bad, I have nothing witty to say about it.

Christmas Fun

Assorted “12 Days” and “Twas’ the Night Before…” take offs. There are enough of these to make a whole section.

NYC Night before, New York City style.
PC "On the 12th day of the Eurocentrically imposed midwinter festival, my potential-acquaintance-abuse-survivor gave to me..."
PC "Twas the night before Christmas and Santa's a wreck..."
Technology "On the first day of Christmas, technology gave to me..."
Solstice 'Twas the Night before Solstice..."
Ebonics "Twas da night befo' Christmas and all in the hood..."
Loquacious "'Twas the nocturnal segment of the diurnal period preceding the annual Yuletide celebration..."
Net On the Net Before Christmas
Networkologists Another "Net Before..."
Implementation "Twas the night before implementation and all through the house"
Chanukah Okay, so it ain't Christmas, but it's still the Night Before.
Tex-Mex "Twas the night before Christmas and all through the casa..."
After "Twas the nite after christmas and all through the house"
Phone Santa Clause is Tapping Your Phone
X-Files The X-Files investigate...
Microsoft 1 Microsoft takes over Christmas...
Month After "Twas the month after Christmas..."
Newsletter A few choice excerpts from Santa's Corporate Newsletter
Reality Why Santa shouldn't exist.

Other Stuff…

Other pages of funny/entertaining stuff. Maybe only funny/entertaining to me.

EQ Quotes Things said in EverQuest
FB Quotes Things said in Facebook